THE SHOT and Life Lessons

Emily's wanted me to get a picture of her split jump all season. I've never caught it. Sometimes I was at the wrong angle, or a split second early or late or didn't have the right lens for the arena we were in.

FINALLY, I got "THE SHOT". But as life is not always perfect neither was this performance. The judges were scoring everyone very hard - scores were consistently much lower than at state. Of course, any sport with judging varies from meet to meet. You hope that judges will be consistent with each athlete and across sessions within each meet.

Emily was also disappointed with her score (9.05) in relation to the other competitors. So when Emily first saw "The Shot" she didn't like it since it was part of the routine that got a lower score than she thought she deserved.

As a Mom, it's been interesting to see how Emily has progressed in dealing with her scores during her two years of competing. As she learns more about the fine points of deductions she is better able to assess her performances and accept her shortcomings on a particular performance. Then again, she is so competitive that she wants to make sure she gets the correct score for each performance and that the judging is fair. Boy, did I have it easy in track - there was so little for the judges to do - most of the time, it was totally clear about how you did as soon as you crossed the finish line.

We've had many talks and some tears about how life isn't always fair. Sometimes you'll never understand why a judge gave you that score or why someone else got the score they got. Just last night, I was watching the US Figure Skating National Championships and the girl who won was very upset about the score she got and how she thought others got too high of scores in the short program. It was a good object lesson for Emily that in every sport with judging and in life you have to deal with disappointment and things being outside of your control. What's important is how you respond. Will you let it get you down and let it keep you down or will you keep it in proper perspective (God's perspective) and let it motivate you as the figure skater used it last night?

We've also talked about how she is a perfectionist, which can be a great strength but it can also be a weakness. Very rarely do we ever hit perfection, how do we handle it when we fall short of our own goal? Perfectionism coupled with extreme competitiveness gives you great drive and determination - it can also weigh heavy when you don't reach your goal.

We talk about how Jesus was the only perfect human to live on this earth. What can He teach us? What does He value? And how He accepts us completely no matter how we perform. The peace He gives can help you face the pain of disappointment and broken dreams. It can also help you focus and put aside the fear before you compete. His peace and perspective can help you have the balance to handle extreme success. It just works in every aspect of life.

As an athlete, you also have to accept that sometimes you just don't perform as well as you want. You've put in the hours and hours of training but it just doesn't all come together at the event. Or it might be due to an injury or sickness. Whatever the reason, it still hurts. Athletes who face those disappointing performances for what they are, learn what they can from them, put them behind them and move on are the athletes who will continue to improve - physically and emotionally. Mental toughness will be a strength for them in the years to come - in all aspects of life.

Just as Emily accepted the fact that I didn't get "The Shot" after each meet, she has accepted that this was "THE SHOT" she had been waiting for. She decided that her floor performance was the best she could do at that time - regardless of what the judges thought. She will learn from the video and her coach what she can work on. She will think of a lot of things when she looks at this picture - great form, that her Mom finally nailed it and how she learned some hard lessons from this meet. She will also remember that she got 4th on floor at this meet, 1st on the beam with a PR and that she finished 2nd all around in her age group. She has to choose what memories she will focus on.

Tough lessons for a 10 year old. Life lessons. Sports can do that. Life can do that.

As a mom, I'm thankful for the lessons she is learning. Yes, they can be hard at times, but they are so worth it. And she isn't the only one learning along the way.